CANS AND CAN’TS OF MINISTRY
Bobby Clinton at Fuller Seminary has studied leaders throughout history. He has come to the conclusion that only 30% of leaders finish well. What a tragedy. As we get older, somehow the giants get bigger, but it doesn’t have to be that way, if we don’t just grow old, but continue to grow up.The Psalmist provides the right image, “They still bear fruit in old age; they are ever full of sap and green,” Psalm 92:14 (ESV)In 1933, President Franklin Roosevelt visited the home of Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr. who was 92 years old. The aging Supreme Court Justice was sitting in his library reading Plato.
“May I ask you why you’re reading Plato” queried the President,“Certainly, Mr. President. To improve my mind.” At the age of 92, Holmes was still learning and growing by reading philosophy.
Fred Smith, successful businessman, wrote,
“Too many of my friends have grown old, not just older, by becoming grumpy old men. They discounted their contribution by writing a sloppy final chapter.” Paul wrote,1 Corinthians 9:26 (The Message) I don’t know about you, but I’m running hard for the finish line. I’m giving it everything I’ve got. No sloppy living for me! As I get older, I realize more and more that I want to leave a lasting legacy, not just an estate.
There are only two things that last forever, the word of God and people! At my final breath, Jesus isn’t going to ask about my bank account, my resume, my stock portfolio or the houses I owned. He will ask me if I invested my gifts, talents and abilities into people, for whom He died.It is all about relationships, everything else is just details. Love God, love people! Simple!I’m learning to lead with love, to be in the moment and to realize that I can’t make anything happen by the power of my will and I can’t change anybody or convince anyone against their will. What I can do is listen for the leading of the Spirit of God as He invites me to participate in His agenda.Dallas Willard was asked why so many pastors burn out. He responded,
“when God does something special in their lives and ministry, they begin to take responsibility to keep that thing going.” Peace comes from realizing that God is moving and He is inviting us to join Him, not because He needs us, but because He wants us.
When we are getting weary and bothered, trying to keep all the plates spinning, we must remember :
Zechariah 4:6, "Not by might, nor by power, but by My spirit, says the Lord." I love The Message translation,Zechariah 4:6 ‘You can’t force these things. They only come about through my Spirit,’ says God-of-the-Angel-Armies. How often I have tried to make something happen for God, rather than praying and paying attention to the moving of the Spirit and joining God in what He is doing.
The Psalmist understood this well:
Psalm 127:1 (ESV) Unless the LORD builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain. It is easy at the beginning to say, “it was all God, He gets the glory!” but with time the focus can shift from God to measly man. When the cloud stops, wise men stop marching. This is a tragic blunder to keep moving when God isn't moving.
To illustrate, consider a common water facet that brings joy to the master. Most of the day it is not doing a thing, it is simply available if the master needs it to pour out clean, cool water. The water facet might feel worthless being stagnant all day, but it is living out its purpose by being available. The master does not want the water facet to pour out water all day and make a mess of things. The water facet simply needs to be available to the touch of the master. Water facets will just make a mess of things if they start turning themselves on.I’m learning that there are somethings I can control as a leader and some things that I cannot control. My best chance at success is to focus my attention on what God wants to change in me.Like the old spiritual that goes,
"It's me, it's me, it's me oh Lord, standing in the need of prayer. Not my brother, nor my sister, but it's me oh Lord, standing in the need of prayer...
The Serenity Prayer is a wonderful reminder of this attitude of accepting what I cannot change.
The Serenity PrayerGod, grant me the serenityTo accept the things I cannot change,The courage to change the things I can,And the wisdom to know the difference.Living one day at a time,Enjoying one moment at a time;Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace;Taking, as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is;Not as I would have it;Trusting that You will make all things rightIf I surrender to Your will;So that I may be reasonably happy in this lifeAnd supremely happy with YouForever in the next.AmenReinhold Niebuhr So I'm learning that...
I CAN'T:
* LIVE IN THE PAST
Sparky Anderson said, “I have my faults, but living in the past isn’t one of them. There ain’t no future in it." The past is a guidepost, not a hitching post. Learn from the past but don’t live there. Turn the page and move forward. There is a reason the rear view mirror is so much smaller than the windshield.
* CONTROL OR EXPLAIN MOST THINGS
I don't need to control people or circumstances. Thinking I am in control is simply an illusion. I also don't have to analyze everything to understand why stuff happens to me. The rain falls on the just and the unjust, God is sovereign and he doesn’t need my permission or help to run the universe.
* CHANGE OR FIX PEOPLE
I have an analytical mind that loves to solve problems and fix people. Why am I surprised that most people aren’t looking for Stan the-fix-it-man to provide the answers, they just want to be loved. Why would somebody share a problem if they didn’t want me to fix it?I am learning that many aren’t asking for solutions, just to be heard, to have a sounding board and to be taken seriously.
* MEET MOST PEOPLE'S EXPECTATIONS
I have spent a lot of years trying to meet people's expectations...my family, my friends, my boss, my church etc. Sometimes it works, but most times it doesn't-at least not for me. I'm finding I need to concentrate on obeying God and being true to how He made me-not trying to be what everybody desires. Only the Lord can truly satisfy someone's expectations, and many still whine about Him.
* HELP PEOPLE WHO DON'T WANT MY HELP
Some people just don't appreciate who I am or what I have to offer with all my experience. This is tough. I like to be needed. I'm learning to wait for the open door. There is nothing more frustrating than to try to open a door that God has shut (Revelation 3:7-8).He opens doors of opportunity and He can shut doors that I want to go through. I'm learning to respect the doors that God has closed, refusing to pick the lock or bribe the valet to let me in.
* AVOID THE TOUGH THINGS IN LIFE
God is more interested in my character than my comfort. I’m motivated to avoid pain at all costs, so I brush my teeth, change the oil in my car and pay my taxes on time. Yet pain is inevitable on this planet, no matter how hard I try to avoid it. God is ever faith to use the tough things in life to help me grow up, not just grow old.
James 1:2-3 in the Phillips translation says, "When all kinds of trials and temptations crowd into your lives, my brothers, don't resent them as intruders, but welcome them as friends! Realize that they come to test your faith and to produce in you the quality of endurance." And I'm also learning:
I CAN:
* FACE REALITY
Author Max Dupree states, "The first task of a leader is to define reality." It is healthy not only to be able to define it, but to accept it and live in it rather than living in denial, pretending the problem doesn’t exist. This is a key to emotional, mental and spiritual health, living in peace.
* CHOOSE THE RIGHT
I am learning to ask if something is the right thing to do, before asking if it is the easy thing to do, or even if it is possible to do. God is in the business of doing what seems utterly impossible. The Bible is full of story after story of God doing what seemed out of the question- the crossing of the Red Sea, the delivery of the Jewish people in the book of Esther, or the saving of Daniel from the lions. Sometimes the right thing looks impossible; but if it is a God-idea, GOD can make it happen!
* TAKE RESPONSIBILITY
On President Harry S. Truman's desk was this statement, "The buck stops here!" A leader is one who takes responsibility for mistakes, poor decisions and sub-par performance. As someone has humorously observed, It is not whether you win or lose, but how you place the blame!NCAA football coach Bear Bryant said, "I'm just a plow hand from Arkansas, but I've learned how to hold a team together, how to lift up some men, how to calm down others, until finally they've got one heartbeat together-a team. There are just three things I'd ever say:
If anything goes bad, I did it,
If anything goes semi-good, then we did it,
If anything goes good, then you did it.
That's all it takes to get people to win football games for you!"These Can's and Cant's are helping me be a better leader!
